sacred whispers blog
Veneration of the Dark Godis is Veneration of the Whole Wombn. Our Power is in Darkness, but first wo-men have to leave our patriarchal conditioning behind - leave the father's house and his rules! Embrace the Way of the Womb!
I think all the time about how very little I could do, if I had a bastard baby.
I have a very expensive makeup and shoe lust. Ain't NO baby getting in the way of that. I thought about that every day, as I woke up in my Jamaican Villa. Looking over James Bond Beach. I thought about it when I stayed at Golden Eye, a multi million dollar resort and spa. I thought about it as I relaxed, trained, healed, grew. How I would be a broken, ugly, useless lump if I had some bastard baby to care for. The reality is I am glad I have no children. And I'm happy WE ARE SPEAKING UP! Bw deserve BETTER than some 2.0. How about getting it right from jump and never needing a retake? Why can't we empower and embolden black girls to CHERISH the Womb space and refuse to grant men access who have made no commitment to them? Fucking for free is for THE DUMB! Not even a married woman should be giving up herself for nothing in return from her man.
This post created quite a few waves. This sister has been called a mammy, and more. Because bw can't just disagree without having to SAVAGE another woman. Because the evil baby mama brigade™ has decided to wage war against the sovereign rite of Breeding in Season, for we who are childfree. They are attacking us all for daring to say we do not want the lives they lead as a result of their choices. Childfree women are being called all kinds of names by the evil baby mama brigade, a they have always done. I don't have to agree with every word written above. And I don't
But I do have to ask... Why can't we have more than the "I ruined my life with a bastard baby; but I got my shyt together and bounced back" story? Why is it so HORRIBLE for us to want more? Why are bw so hypersensitive that one sisters truth is read as a personal attack? For all our strengths, are we really so weak as to lack an ability to introspect and Be the Sovereign women or Gods we claim we are? Doesn't look like it. I love Ciara. I based my entire Dark Marriage 1 and Dark Marriage 2 class around her story. Training hundreds of bw how to bounce back with REAL DARK WISDOM! Which REAL DARK WISDOM is WITCH CRAFT or it is BULLSHYT! Period REAL DARK WISDOM is WITCH CRAFT or it is BULLSHYT! Period -Deva Fiyah
I enjoyed teaching. But I wish to GODIS we didn't have to coddle black women who fucked their lives over being foolish and self sacrificing. I don't even want to bother with such women anymore because they are often broken beyond repair and thus unable to do any work to heal. They balk at any attempt to help them grow and most would rather sit in their cursed state. Breeding out of season is a curse on you and the fruit of your womb. And I am not interested anymore in enabling and coddling such women. I'm interested now in the daughters who avoided this curse of breeding out of season. To help them stay the course.
So the WEAK among us will balk at the Priestess Wisdom I share. The WISE AND SAVVY BW are paying attention to win. Priestess Wisdom changed my life. And it has the power and ability to change yours too. I have a new 5 part course SEASON OF THE WITCH: Priestess Wisdom for Modern BW. I will be sharing with you sisters how to be The Priestess of your own life. How to preside over the realm of creation and death, with Real Dark Wisdom, and Dark Gnosis for Power Black women have been stripped of all power and authority. Left behind with nothing but self hate, self loathing, self sacrifice and self sabotage. This is 75% of bw too. You who encounter/come to me for healing are the Rare 1 in 4 who will divest and win. You need to learn how to identify with YOURSELF, and not concern yourself with someone else's struggles, failures and stupid decisions in life. We are NOT all in this together, the black sisterhood is dead and filled with bitter women who want you to FALL because they fell for the one eyed snake! Don't let them do that to you. Ignorance is indeed a CURSE, and the fallen bw wants to keep you ignorant thus cursed with her and her manifested bad decision making. Sign up here for my 5 course series SEASON OF THE WITCH: PRIESTESS WISDOM FOR MODERN BW
This isn't a question I ever considered until after I was married. I had plenty of evidence, plenty of reasons to ask this question. But I never allowed it. All my life, I had heard how "white" I was from black people. Wanting to be married before having babies? "You sound like a white woman" is what I heard back from never married, black mothers. Wanting to go to college? "Aunties kids think they white" was the retort of cousins, my mothers friends at work also would say to her that her children "thought they were white" for our ambitions and desires. My desires and wishes as a teenager?
There were others. But let's keep this short. Repeatedly, I was called too ambitious and strong minded (as if it is negative to be of sound and strong mind) to be a black woman. The way I talked was ridiculed, the way I walked and dressed too. So I should have seen it coming. Alas, I was a very friendly child. And quite naive to how evil and sadistic the world can be. I was a girl in love with a boy, wanting to make a family. In my young mind, at that time, I was doing what every heterosexual woman alive wanted to. I was getting married to the love of my life and forming a new family. As women have done for thousands of years. I didn't see any of what they saw. I didn't see my choice to be loved by a Masculine Provider as a rejection of anything. This awareness was borne, by the reaction and response of the black people around me. The women in my family turned against me the moment discussion of marriage to him became a reality. Once he proposed, I saw them shift away from me completely. They were all black women. And suddenly? I wasn't one. They were in this together, and I had betrayed the pack. My mother and my sisters, my aunties all reacted as if I BETRAYED them. I couldn't understand how how my life choices to be married and happy could be received as anything else. My life long refusal to conform to black "standards" (if we can call them that) of what it means to be a black woman; suddenly was too much. Not only had I rejected sexual coupling with the black woman's son all my teenaged years, in my 20's I was getting married to a man who also wasn't a black woman's son. This is a HUGE no no. They loved me, as long as I was talking about how we shouldn't take shyt. But the MONENT I actually practically applied it? I was deemed self hating. Many of you reading this will also deem me as "self hating" because I refuse to accept degradation and struggle as the definition of blackness. The rejection of the poverty consciousness that is now the prevailing black identity, the rejection of the struggle narrative of a bum and a baby, the rejection of being the ni**er of the world by mulling for a thankless community.... Chile the women in my family started treating me like I was the uppity light skint auntie!!! Simply for wanting MORE! For refusing to provide emotional labor to "the cause" aka the black male. And they also began trying to bleed us dry financially. Not only am I married, I married outside the race. And ya know white men are "rich." I used to balk when folks said blacks are racist. I towed the party line of "blacks don't control the system" ya know. The regurgitated sound bite. But.... Blacks do control the system. In fact, the system is PREDICATED upon black inferiority. And since BLACK PEOPLE now define BLACKNESS as being broke, hood, a baby mama/daddy, never married, not speaking articulately or able to write cogent mf sentences!!!! All of this makes you black. I was called white all my life. Because we grew up outside the hood and I read books..... because I wanted to go to college!!! No bs. And other stupid ass shyt. I used to balk when folks said blacks are racist. I towed the party line of "blacks don't control the system" ya know. The regurgitated sound bite. Tell A negro you own your own business? They back the fuck up and look at yuh funny. Blacks don't have business. They have side hustles to make ends meet!!!! How do we differentiate between the groups? The blacks who want to thrive and live well, and the blacks who have begun to accept struggle and degradation as the sole narrative and defining quality of what it means to be black? As a Priestess and Healer of the Womb, I often get bw complaining about the cost of healing and the cost of sessions. It has been said, "She think she a white woman with them prices." Baby, the white woman charges you hundreds and often THOUSANDS of dollars to speak to her for 1 hour. I only charge ya black ass $125. Seriously!? 😂 Black folks degrade blackness, project their willful degradation onto whiteness, and blame white people for not being dysfunctional beasts in THEIR communities. Or cite the anomalies in white communities to justify the indignity of black community. This whole thing is a part of the black psychosis and mental illness. I am going to now deem BLACKNESS ITSELF as mental illness. We have to invent a new identity, or at least a way to delineate between the mentally stable and the mentally insane. First of all, black = brain lack. You lack certain cognitive functions and mental faculties to be healthy and successful. The definition of INSANE is to repeatedly do the same thing, expecting a different result. And yet here we have negros. Doing the same dumb shyt generation after generation. Blackness is mental illness. To be black now means to be mentally deprived and mentally impaired. That is the only way to actually identify with the culture and call it your own. You have to become ONE of them. Or you ain't really black. Dark as I am?? I'm not considered a "true" black woman. Nope. Ya right. I'm not. I don't have the mental impairment of a black woman. I am a woman of dark hue. But I am not the same as a black woman. Discovering who you are, is a huge part of divestment from blackistan. The black community tells you who to be and assigns a role to you. To break free, and trailblaze is to divest and be Sovereign. We have to go from Empathy to Apathy, as black women. The whole world preys on our hearts and good intentions. Becoming apathetic to the plight of others is how we divest from being mammy and instead invest in being WHO WE TRULY ARE. discovery of this is difficult without help, schedule your session with the Priestess. Let's change your life together. Schedule your Session with The Priestess Here.#DarkFeminine So the courts have decided that it is perfectly legal to racially discriminate against bw's natural hair? They have decided to allow companies to hire and fire bw based on our natural tresses. They have legislated against Gods Nature, in the banning of our natural hair. We allowed it to get to this point. When they came for the trees, we said nothing. When they came for the water, we said nothing. When they came for the womb, we said nothing. And now they have come for the Crown. Not on my watch! Arise you Dark Witches! Your Mystic Powers and Potent Essences are needed once more. As a Loc Godis myself, I will not sit back on this one. I wear my love proud! They represent my Spirituality, my Power, my Authority, my Splendor, my Cosmic Connection to the Dark Mother, these Locs Breathe and divine. They alert me to dangers near and far, I hear better because my Antennas are always up! And as the Dark Divine Feminine rises, they seek to snuff us out, to attack us, to limit our Great Power. I will not protest, I will not organize or march. But see this lil light of mine? Imma let it shine. These Black SKULL Candles will light for 30 days. As I call on the Ancestral Mothers. To guide us with wisdom, home to our Dark Mothers. I will invoke and conjure the Dark Legions that serve The Me. Arise you Dark Witches, you Dark Bishes, you Evil Witches. We call upon the Infernal Names of the Great Blak She, the Darkness Upon the Deep. ~Luna, The Angry God Sign up here for our 30 day Invocation of the Dark Mother.I tried to change. Closed my mouth more, tried to be softer, prettier, less awake. ~Beyonce, Lemonade When I first saw Beyonce's Lemonade, the above words brought sobs to the surface for me. Because I could relate, as a survivor of male sexual terrorism and its evil sibling, The Savage Sisterhood. I have experienced such gross brutality, along my healing journey. A fate many of us, who have survived sexual terrorism, seem doomed to experience. ~Deva Fiyah
The past few days I've been proud of myself and my sisters. Watching those disloyal women abuse me, call me crazy, tell people I was mentally unstable years ago... Yet not mention I was raped and that RAPE is what caused the PTSD I still suffer, was triggering. It makes you not want to connect to people, at all, while you are healing. I know. I understand and I am sorry you all, we all, had to witness and experience that. It takes a while for us to heal. Some of us never recover, I am thankful for the gift of healing. I am one of the lucky ones. These women wanted to use my formerly unhealed spaces, to destroy me. Why? All too often, in the black community; when a black girl is sexually abused she is disbelieved. Black girls never get to be girls, we come into the world with the cultural, and now global, expectation that we have the cognitive skills and abilities of full grown, never traumatized, adults. We are expected to shoulder tremendous amounts of emotional, financial, and spiritual burdens. To even dare to say you are hurting, as a black woman, to other black women; is seen as some sort of competition and definitely deemed weakness. In our communities, the females are demanded to be "strong" (read: long-suffering) yet are vulnerable because we have no protection from the males of our race. Moreover, the males of our race are our primary attacker/rapist, and are encouraged to be weak and predatory of our femaleness and femininity. To be soft, vulnerable, open, to need support and understanding often makes bw a target for brutality from bw and bm alike. Many bw have experienced their own mothers not only invalidating the molestation/rape that occurred, but blaming the girl for it. My own mother, at age 7, was molested during a slumber party, by her friends 14 year old brother. When she told, they convinced her she was having a bad dream. They attacked her psyche, and tried to convince her, she'd made it up. Made her question her sanity, gas-lighting it is called, so they did not have to deal with the discomfort of a male, sexually molesting a 7 year old baby girl. Unfortunately, she grew up to become a woman who continued this sadistic tradition with me, when I was molested as a baby girl. We are called fast in the ass, hot tailed and easy; to dismiss the sexually predatory behavior of black boys and men. Being able to articulate ourselves is tough. Our voices are primarily stomped out, when we have survived sexual terrorism. First by the sexual abuse, and next by the response and reaction of the women in our families and our communities, at large. Recovering from Sexual Assault is difficult enough on its own. To know that our global climate demands that women "get healing" yet not many are invested in being supportive of women as we achieve that healing, compounds this issue. And too many have a false notion of what that healing should look like. Rape is a curse, do not be deceived, it is a curse against the Divine Feminine. When we have been cursed and we forgive our rapist, we essentially lay down in that energy. We wear it, it steals our life and vitality. We deny ourselves the right to be restored, healed, set free, delivered from the curse of male sexual terrorism. The Yoni and the Womb are so delicate, such Divine Intimate spaces in our being. When a man has assaulted your yoni, or a woman for that matter, we store it. We hold it. It turns into dis-ease, into physical manifestations that we did not intend and that do not bode well for us. (cancers, high blood pressure, heart disease, dementia, alzheimers and others.) I have issued myself a challenge regarding how I articulate my thoughts. With Angry Devas, the whole point was for me to be as crass, forward and brash as possible. To learn to be comfortable with making others uncomfortable. This was hard for me. I created it, so I could keep on living after being raped. I did the show every day, to stay alive. Angry Deva Saved my life, I clung to her like a baby for 3 years. Almost stunting my growth.
My rage came from rape, my anger came from rape and betrayal. So... The women who are upset with me, for cussin, fussin, and taking no shyt? Are women who would have preferred that I stayed quiet and unhealed. They don't care to understand what rape does to us. Some use our journey to jab at us, rape culture is enacted by women too. Angry Devas, as I said from the outset, was for me. I created Angry Devas so I had a place to recover and restore after sexual assault trauma. I needed an outlet, a place to access and wield my Righteous Indignation. I had to get it out of my system. We encourage expression even self expression; until we dislike how someone expresses themselves. Until we begin to deem ourselves as greater or higher than another and tell them how they should be, or react, or heal. The world is abusive to raped women, too. Perhaps worse. Healing doesn't look the same for everyone. Some people need to forgive. Some need to move on. And some of us, we beautiful messes? We require vengeance, to be restored. That vengeance often gets waged against the soul, when we do not express ourselves, our true feelings. For years, I was angry. I was angry at bm, because it was a bm who raped me, who molested me, who abused me sexually. It was always a bm. I was angry with bw, starting with my mother. Because she failed to protect me. As a girl, I did not allow myself to feel that anger at all. I certainly never expressed it. I was angry with women who have sons, because they are the ones who give birth to the men who rape us. |
AuthorDeva Fiyah is a Priestess, Anthropologist, Feminist, and Feminine historian. She has helped women from all around the world, actualize their Goddess Power, with Healing, Retreats and Courses in Self Mastery. Archives
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