When Darkess Creeps in: Healing the Wounded Feminine

We are away this weekend. I adore being a New England girl because of all the trees and our close proximity to everything that is wonderful. :)

When you are in pain? You cannot enjoy your happiness, your relationship, your business. Joy just keeps escaping you. And it will, I promise, until you allow yourself to do and say all the things you've been told not to.

My trauma wounds, from the abuse I endured from my mother, to the sexual assault and molestation I survived; almost caused me to destroy every good thing in my life. I had a hard time trusting the right people, because I didn't trust myself. I, like most women who have survived sexual assault, blamed myself. I questioned my value. How can I be The Oracle, a Priestess, a Witch, a Healer; and be raped? Why didn't I see this coming? Why couldn't I stop it.

I beat myself up that way for years. I pushed away all the people who truly loved me. I connected with women who were jealous, envious, catty, petty, and also unhealed. I didn't think myself worthy of loving connection to other people.

I could only see the rape. I felt dirty, used, and unworthy

I'm here to tell you? That is a bold faced lie. We are worthy, and what's more, what happened to us is not our fault. We will heal, despite the fact that the entire world leaves us traumatized and without true support and understanding. We will stand together, loving ourselves into healing. And remembering that we are the value and the prize.

Deva Fiyah, the Controversial Oracle

Photo: by me of love without color.